Being a NICU nurse for over 10 years, I deeply believe that all the sentient beings are equal and deserve to be loved and respected.
Serving the tiniest population, we are sensitive to their fragileness of body and system. A baby’s condition may change rapidly, it can go either directions, we pay close attention to every changes to provide the proper care to them. Baby’s family is part of the NICU care; we need pay attention to their needs as well. With our tinny patients, we also need to be aware of their psychological and spiritual needs. Each baby is a unique individual and we ought to provide individualized care to them.
As NICU nurse, we often talk to our tiny patients. We talk to them as they were adults, as if they really understand what we are talking about. People outside of the NICU may think we’re crazy because the tiny babies could not talk and perhaps could not understand what we were talking about. In fact, they do.
Buddhists believe that human life is part of the samsara. Our spirit exists in beginningless time and we have been circling in samsara for long time. In some point, we should have some memories of our past life. And the premature babies certainly have better memories of that since they have not been exposed to the current life as much. And they do know what they want and understand what is going on. And they do have the right to be notified what is going to happen to their body and environment.
There is a Chinese proverb: Treat people as you want to be treated. (己所不欲，勿施于人) This is what we should do for our tiny patients as well.
Like us, Babies do not like surprises.
In my experience as a NICU nurse, if you tell the babies what you are going to do, they tend to do better. Some of them even cooperative and behave well. Normally, before I start to do anything with the baby, I often open the isolette and call their name: “hello baby xxx, this is Snow. It is the time again. I am going to take your temperature and it will be really quick. I have to hold your arm so you cannot move it for couple minutes. ” While taking the temperature, I keep talking, either praise them being so good or talk to them about what will happen after that or tell them what is going on with their parents. Sometimes, I let them know that their parents are coming to visit soon and will hold them and let them know that everyone loves them. Most of time, babies are very reasonable and they will not cry if you talk to them. Otherwise, if you don’t say anything, and just open their door and put your hands on them, they will fight and cry. Again, they do not like surprises! Waking a baby up without telling them what is happening is not nice. Of course they will be upset and the only way they can express their feeling is cry. I have seen lots of those “reasonable” babies and I really enjoy taking care of them.
Like us, babies like to be cleaned and confortable.
When the diaper is wet or dirty, they want to be changed and they will cry until get changed. When we see a baby who is restless, or irritable, or crying, there must be a reason. We need to find out what made them so. If you carefully check, you will find the problem. Once we take care of their discomfort, they will likely to go back to sleep. Do not disturb a sleeping baby unless it is medically necessary. Babies grow only when they are in deep sleep.
Babies’ parents are the ones under extreme stress: their little child is under someone else’s care which they may not really trust, and they could not do much about it. The anxiousness, the helpless ness really can make them crazy and depressed.
Nurses, as scientist, sometimes concentrated on tasks, diseases, conditions, medications, procedures and so on. We may be sensitive enough to our tiny patients but not to the parents. During our busy work schedule, most time, parents’ needs were over looked. We are there not only for the babies, but the parent as well. But in a rare occasion, we may be physically present, but not fully present for the family. I have couple of experiences while I was busy with other patients and work and not fully present to the parents which cause lots of stress for them. Luckily, I have the ability to examine myself and trying to do better later.
Nurses are very lucky to help people who are suffering. Being a nurse is also a lifelong meditation process to be present for our patients and family all the time.
I am very lucking being a NICU nurse. The tinniest patients taught me to be respectful, patient, gentle, thorough, and present fully all the time. I am still learning from them and their family. Growing up with my tinny patients is a privilege for being a NICU nurse.
I love my job.
